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Writer's pictureKaren Astromsky

Deja Vu All Over Again?


This time last year, I kept hearing everyone say that there are so glad 2021 was finally coming to an end because it was kind of a disappointment after the shock and trials and isolation of 2020. But now, I am hearing the same thing this year--so glad 2022 is over, bring on 2023 because it has to get better. But, here's the other thing--it's hard to feel positive and hopeful and like moving forward in a big, bad way when things still seem so hard in a big, bad way. The world is not setting itself right yet. With churning uncertainty and disappointment or fear, we are still in a global tough spot.


Yes, I know. I am the mindset coach. I am the one who helps people shift the mindset from unhelpful to helpful thoughts. I am the one who offers clarity, encouragement, motivation, inspiration, accountability and humor...to the challenge. But I am not a pretender. I do not trade in toxic positivity (pretend it's good and then it will be).


One of the best mindset shifts anyone can ever make is to commit to recognizing the situation for what it IS, in the moment.


Moments change. Thoughts, feelings and actions change frequently. It's ok not to like what's going on. It's ok to acknowledge those thoughts and feelings. It's also ok to set that aside and move on with something you do like. That's called making the most of the situation, which is a life skill often called resiliency.


Friends, we have been practicing these hard lessons for quite a long time. We have been adapting, adjusting, lowering expectations at the stores, managing fear and disappointment, isolating and then reuniting, facing scarcity in staffing at critical places like hospitals and pharmacies. It's a lot. It's taking its toll. I point this out, because if you are not feeling like JUMPING INTO 2023 with a bottle of champagne and a list of bright new ideas for yourself, there are lots of reasons why.


I am not suggesting you lower your standards. That would really be doom and gloom. I am suggesting that you make a few lists as a source of reflection for what has been--and for what will be--on your terms. When you consider 2022, list your accomplishments (great and small) including painting the bathroom or starting the divorce process or letting your hair go natural. All the accomplishments that have moved your life into forward motion. List your disappointments. The people, events, circumstances, activities that left you feeling less than. Even if that list includes the people closest to you, as in, maybe yourself sometimes. It can happen. And then, list the things you are grateful for from 2022. Relive the moments, the memories, the people and enjoy it all over again.


Then, onward to hopes, dreams and great expectations for 2023. We are living in the NOW. We are still covid-affected. We are still dealing with the scarcity that covid created. We don't need to focus on it, but it is in the background, which explains a lot. So, what do you want for yourself in 2023? What do you want to do? Where do you want to go? How would you like to feel? What energy do you want to bring to your interactions? How would you like to be handling life's stressors? Is it time to get a pet? A new hairdo? A new hobby? What's due for a change this year? Make those lists. Dream big. And then plan to act. Maybe you choose a word of the year--mine is "soft landings". Let it be easy by flowing with not against nature.


You are not a new year's resolution. Your life is not totally different because the ball dropped in Times Square at the stroke of midnight. You are the ever-evolving you. You can make a change any time, any day, any week, any month, any year. Your dreams wait for no one or nothing. You are wiser, than you were a year ago, because you've lived longer. You know more. You feel more. You've experienced more. Lead with that.


I want to thank you for reading these blogs. I hope they help you make sense of what's in front of you, so that you live the life you want to live. True fulfillment.


If you are struggling to make sense of your situation, connect with me. This is my superpower--helping people through tough times.






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