This is a phrase I think of from childhood--YOU CAN'T MAKE ME! I think I probably screamed this at the top of my lungs to my siblings more than once. The fact of the matter is, this is true. No one can "make" you do anything including YOURSELF. You cannot make yourself do something if you are hell bent on not doing it.
The opposite is true as well. IF you are hell bent on doing something, there is nothing that can stop you. You will find a way. It will happen. You will not let up until you get what you are going for. You become activated, motivated, driven by the very thing you want, and no matter what obstacles come in your way--you keep going. You are on a mission.
This sounds dramatic and loud. Most of life is not this dramatic. In fact, most of life is spent in quieter moments where you find yourself alone with your thoughts and start ruminating over why you can't get motivated to get your work done or go on that walk or get out of your head and choose a more agreeable thought/feeling/action. It happens to everyone, because it is a normal part of the human condition. Believe me, I know.
So, I am proposing a new affirmation, mantra, saying, and it goes like this--YOU CAN'T MAKE ME, BUT I CAN. I can make me. I can choose. I can look the other way. I can decide to knock off what isn't working and invite in what just might work. It's a shift that might have to happen all day long, depending on your circumstances.
Here is a list of few switcharoo thoughts/feelings/actions that keep coming up with people I talk to. Try them out in case they might help.
I feel so bad, and I feel so stuck, and I can't stand it. I don't feel good--that's for sure, and I do know that I am not where I want to be--that's true too. But I am not staying here. This is not permanent.
I don't know what the next right thing is. I don't feel like making any moves. Life feels so hard. I don't have to know what the next right thing is. I don't have to make a move right this minute, but I can't give up on myself. I survived every hard day of my life, and I will survive this too.
I let myself down. I let myself go. I am so mad at myself. I have no one to blame. UGH. I said I would never let this happen--and here I am again. I am a work in progress, and the progress never ends. I am always learning, and I am going to learn from this. I may not know what yet, but there has to be something for me in this experience.
I've been telling myself things that I would never tell anyone else. I've had really unpleasant thoughts about people close to me too. It's just bad all over, and I feel overwhelmed by it. It's depressing and soul-sucking. I will not talk trash about myself anymore. In fact, I will take out the mental trash that makes me feel bad and gets me overwhelmed. It is time for grace space. I am one human being on this planet having a very imperfect experience. Just like everyone else. One moment at a time. I am always cheering you on, every step of the way! Keep going! xo Coach Karen :))