I am almost 59 years old, and if someone had told me that I would be thinking about aging issues to the extent that I do, at this point in my life, I wouldn't have believed them.
But...that's exactly the case.
I just returned from a visit to the Pocono Mountains to visit my 87 year old dad. You know I have bragged about how he is a SEVEN year pancreatic cancer survivor. Unheard of! Yes. How can it be? It is! So that's the upside. My dad is a medical miracle. The downside is that he has side effects from his chemotherapy and surgery like neuropathy in his legs and chronic fatigue and limited appetite. His biggest disappointment? He can't golf seven days a week like he had been two years ago. The neuropathy creates imbalance. He also is 87 years old, and he has outlived all but two of his buddies.
So his situation reminds me of the "work" I talk about all the time. We are "both/and" people who carry with us both the good and the not so good at all times. It is a choice that we all have to focus on one or the other. EASIER said than DONE. Believe me, I know. When you are having a tough time, it's hard to see beyond your troubles. But, everyone has troubles. It is all about how you decide to define them, or let them define you.
I had a big knee surgery 18 months ago. I still have to rehab that knee and can't run without pain (so I don't). I had a boulder on my shoulder about how frustrated I was about it, until one day at yoga, a student much younger than me told me that he had the same surgery and has the same problems. PERSPECTIVE. I am not alone. UNDERSTANDING. I am not special. I am like other people with the same situation. RELIEF. I thought I was failing. COMPASSION. This is my life. I can do other things.
This is why mindset matters, working on your thoughts, shifting your thoughts, reality checking your thoughts and that tape that plays non-stop in your head makes all the difference in the world. Whose voice do you want to listen to anyway? The voice of doom, the voice of the past, the voice of frustration, or the voice of possibility?
Making the best of any situation is a choice we have to make every day. It's so easy to be happy and positive when things are going well. WAHOO! It is a life's work to be grateful and optimistic and look on the bright side when life's challenges are delivered to your doorstep. When it concerns your health, nothing else matters which is something I learned when my baby Natalie had cancer as a six month old. My dad, as an 87 year old speaks of this all the time.
All this to say, check in often with what you are telling yourself about your life, your problems, your health, your people. Whose voice is speaking? Is it the voice you want to listen to? Reality check your stories. Are they factual? What is the opposite thought? One thing I like to say to myself--what if it did work out? What if it worked out better than what I was thinking? What if I don't have to know how but that it is possible?
I am cheering you on every step of the way, and letting you know I am doing the "work" all the time, myself!
xo Coach Karen :))
Check out this interview I did recently on resilience. Another life skill we practice over and over again!
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