Hello darling friends! It feels like just yesterday when I was romantically reminiscing and writing about what Paris did for me before I left on a trip to... Paris, of course. We had a great time, and with seven adults and two babies under a year old--it was amazing. Paris never disappoints. Lou and I went off for two days "in the country" to Normandy and visited Monet's Garden in Giverny. Pictures do not do it justice. And I even found some curtains for my kitchen in Rouen (Joan of Arc was burned at the stake there.) I brought some of my trip back with me.
Of course we ate wonderful meals, saw wonderful sights, felt wonderful feelings, smelled butter baking all over, and then we came back.
I could end this blog right now, and you could fill in your own ideas about what happened next. No disasters, but disappointments, for sure. A dying peony patch for starters. Vacation mindset and "real life" mindset are so very different. It was one article I read, about happenings in my own town, that really smacked me back into reality.
Here is my brief take on true events. There was a woman having afternoon tea (think fancy china, scones, crustless sandwiches and pastries) at a Minneapolis restaurant. She was with friends, and this was not an inexpensive outing--something like $55 per person. As it turns out, somehow the server put the tea pot on the table which wasn't balanced as well as it could be--and the tea spilled, and the china crashed to the ground, and the pastries landed on the floor. You get the picture.
Nobody is going out for afternoon tea expecting a lovely time only to witness a crash. Not the woman or the server. Apologies and clean up and let's get this straightened out were all delivered. But this being 2022, that was not the end of the story. A few days later, the woman called the restaurant demanding her money back and demanding the situation become righted where it went wrong because it was the restaurant's fault this happened that she had a wobbly table that set the stage for broken china, wasted pastries, bad PR.... where does it end? Apparently, for the customer, there was no end. Basically she wanted to complain bitterly, magically have the experience expunged from her memory bank, be reimbursed her money and be listened to as she went on and on and on.
Yes, that's the story that brought me back to reality. These outward expressions of adults behaving badly, or as I like to say "people not acting right." It's also an expression of how powerless/entitled and/or annoyed and/or stressed-out that woman had to be to make such a stink. You caught the part about how she was having afternoon tea for $55 a person?
So what does sharing this story have to do with my mindset coaching mission in life?
It is a stark reminder that what you choose to focus on will grow bigger and loom larger than what you choose to let go of.
Checking in with your mindset, your thoughts, especially the ones that bother you is a reminder that you have a decision to make. You can continue down the path of thinking the worst of the world and table legs in restaurants, or you can focus on what you want more of. To move on? To let go of things you can't control? To notice annoyances without breaking down because of them?
It's a fragile world. We are enduring tough times in so many ways. We are tired of practicing our resiliency skills. Yes, we can come out of this, because we have come out of tough times before. True, but we don't want to have to. That's the thought I choose not to focus on, because it is not helpful for my sanity.
I don't know about you, but my goal is to not be that person--I am not "that Karen" the one who breaks down when stupid stuff happens.
Instead, I am focusing on my "summer of fun" as I call it. I want to make the most of it, so I am biking at least three times a week in addition to my other physical activities. I am also spending as much time outside as I can. I am getting to the farmer's market this weekend. I am eating lots of summer produce. Paris is now a memory--and a fond one--but my plan is to make more summer memories right around my very own home. I hope you are too.
Join me LIVE on FACEBOOK every Wednesday at 4PM CENTRAL when I coach about mindset. You can always watch the replays in Facebook if you can't make it! If you ever want to come on camera, LIVE with me, let me know. :)) www.facebook.com/karenastromskycoaching
I have a YouTube channel with mindset coaching videos and yoga/qi gong and meditation videos. Check that out too. www.youtube.com/karenastromskycoachkaren