I had an ick experience a week ago. One of my bosses called to tell me that one of my yoga students submitted a complaint about my class that she attended two times. She said she had never been to a class like that...I said rude things...WAM! That took me off my game instantly. My initial reaction was--WHAT? WHO? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I have been teaching yoga and qi gong for almost ten years, and this is the first complaint I have ever gotten. NO matter, this stung badly. In the moment and for a few days I was trying to pick myself up.
I share this story with you because even though we may practice our mindset routines, choose our thoughts which then determine our feelings, we can be thrown off course unexpectedly. And it is in that moment when we need the most help.
It takes three positive thoughts to cancel out one negative thought.
So, what to do in the heat of the moment? Pause. Feel the feelings. Notice what's happening. The cortisol goes up. The heart rate speeds. The defense (fight or flight) reaction activates. And then, take a deep breath and check yourself. Ask yourself--is this true? Is this thought based in reality? If it is, then consider what to do next. If it isn't, then the work is letting it go.
This is where kindness and self compassion come in. We are all human, and we are all imperfect, which means we may sometimes get it wrong. That will always be the case.
Treat yourself with kindness. Be gentle. Take a break. Shake it out in your body. Flood your mind with self compassion.
Remind yourself of your worth. Look at your folder of thank you notes (I keep one). Recall the people in your life who picked you up when you were down, and remember them and how they made you feel. My French teacher, Mrs. Holman, comes to mind. She always, always made the world a better place for me. She always, always knew what to say to help me feel better. Bring those feelings back.
We all need the most help when we are most challenged. The good news is that the more we practice kindness and self compassion, the more we train the brain to go there in times of stress. Always evolving. We are in it together.
xo Coach Karen :))